It isn’t easy to change.
The hardest part is looking at yourself and seeing yourself the way others see you. Sometimes you don’t know what others see. Sometimes you don’t want to. Sometimes it’s particularly difficult because habits sit comfortably around your shoulders. When those habits hold you back from being who you want to be, they become a pillory holding you in place.
Breaking those behaviour habits takes so much effort. Once you understand what needs to change, they you can finally create new thoughts, words, and actions for those light weight moments. Slowly those new ways of doing things become easier in more stressful situations. And eventually they become your new habits. The pillory removed.
For me, it hasn’t been easy, I still make so many mistakes. But change is happening. It has to happen. Just as Ryan inadvertently hurt me so many times over the years, I also hurt him. And the two of us together have hurt our children as a result.
We are changing, becoming, transforming ourselves and each other. As a result our family is happier and healthier every day.
I’m so excited to see where we’ve come and to see where we want to be! There is so much joy in our lives now compared to last year, or even a few months ago.
Change is hard. But it’s worth it. Each day I am thankful Ryan and I are both saying yes to the changes in our lives!